White Shadows
by Persephone Choiseul
Summary: The war has ended and Trowa's finally confessed his love for Quatre... but wait... it was all a dream? Quatre's not real... or rather the Pilot of Sandrock is not. None of the Gundam Pilots are. AU with a twistish. 3x4. Language warning. on HIATUS
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing.

A/N: I write this in between studying. So this was done in my breaks, which is why its short. It is also short because I have never written a 3x4 before and so I wanted to know if I got the personalities right or not before writing down 4000 words on it.

This is a prologue. Hope you like. But please be critical, I need to know if Trowa is right or not. He's my weakest point and hence I chose to write from his point of view (in a way)

Enjoy!

Chapter 1: What If

Posted on 24th Nov 2007

"The war is over Trowa." Duo said to the green-eyed boy as they watched their Gundams being taken to space to be destroyed. "Finally huh?" He said when he saw Trowa smile slightly.

"I would never have thought we'd survive… all of us." Quatre said and Trowa turned to look at him. He'd been falling in love with him since the first time they met and they'd played music together… and now… the war was over. Maybe he could confess? Tell him how he felt for the gentle boy…

"Quatre I…"

"Yo! Heero and I are going to go celebrate! You have to come with us!" Duo announced as he dragged the unwilling Japanese with him.

Quatre placed a warm hand on Trowa's shoulder. "Let's go or he'll leave us behind."

"I have to talk to you about something Quatre…" He said quickly and Quatre stopped to look at him.

"What is it Trowa?"

"I was just wondering… I like you… Do you… would you…?" He couldn't get the actual question out and he looked away, suddenly shy. Quatre laughed gently.

"You don't know how long I've waited to hear you say that." He said as he reached up and kissed him lightly. "I like you too… a lot…" He said as Trowa smiled and kissed him more deeply.

'_There's a change in his vitals doctor!'_

He hugged Quatre closer feeling his warmth seep into his arms. He had never thought he'd survive the wars long enough to actually be with him.

'_Is he waking up? Can you hear me Mr. Bloom?'_

And to think that Quatre would feel the same way about him!

'_Can you hear me?'_

When he finally let go of Quatre he felt immensely satisfied. He felt like his world was complete and now he didn't care what the future held as long as he had the smaller boy in his arms.

Suddenly there was a flash of light and his eye was pried open. In front of him was a flashlight blinding him and he weakly turned his head away from it.

"He's awake! This is a miracle! He's returned from the coma!" Someone announced and Trowa slowly opened his eyes wondering what's going on. The light in the room assaulted his eyes and he quickly shut them again.

"How are you feeling Mr. Bloom?" Someone asked and he opened his eyes again. The room was darker now. There was a doctor standing in front of him looking him over critically.

"Wh…" He swallowed thickly, his throat felt dry and rough with disuse. Someone held a straw against his lips and he swallowed gratefully, feeling the cool water soothe his throat immensely. "What's going on?"

"You are at the hospital. How are you feeling?" The doctor asked.

"My head hurts… feel weak…"

"That's normal, we'll give you some painkillers in a little bit. Do you know your name?"

"Trowa Barton." He said. The doctor looked a little worried but Trowa ignored him. "Where are the others?"

"The others?"

"Quatre… Heero, Duo, Wufei… where are they? Are they hurt? Why am I in the hospital?" He asked feeling sudden panic settle in. If he was in the hospital and none of the other guys were here with him… maybe they were hurt too?

"What is the last thing you remember Mr. _Barton_?" The doctor asked scribbling frantically on a little notepad.

'Kissing Quatre' "The gundams… they were sent to be destroyed…"

"The gundams?" The doctor raised his eyebrow at that. "How old are you?"

"Sixteen."

The doctor looked at a nurse and nodded. She seemed to get the message and she left. He returned his attention to Trowa.

"It may come as a shock to you Mr. _Barton_, but you're eighteen years old and your real name is Triton Bloom. You've been in a coma for the past three years. You've been visited only by your sister Catherine Bloom and gundums are robots in a comic book."

Trowa stared at him. This is a bad, bad joke.

"Where's Quatre?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Quatre Raberba Winner. He's blond, about 156 cm, has blue eyes, an innocent smile. He's the heir of Winner Enterprises. Piloted Sandrock."

"I'm afraid I don't know who you're talking about-"

"Duo Maxwell. Also 156 cm, brunette, violet eyes, mischievous, was involved in the Maxwell church fire." Doctor shook his head again. "Wufei Chang…"

"Stop Mr. Bloom. You'll strain yourself. I do not recognize any of the names you have stated."

"This is a joke… this is a joke." Trowa chanted to himself.

"I'll have you referred to a psychiatrist. But I believe that you may have just seen an elaborate dream." The doctor said. "I'll leave you to rest for a little while. Maybe you'll feel better after you've recovered a bit more." He said before leaving.

Trowa held his head in his hands. "This can't be happening… Quatre…"

* * *

A/N: I've been toying with this plot for AGES. I finally got down to writing it. It's not perfect but usually the story tends to figure itself out eventually. And don't worry, Quatre's not ENTIRELY Trowa's imagination. 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing.

A/N: It was brought to my attention that the story's start is very similar to cjmarie's 'Zero Tolerance'. This just to let everyone know that I enjoy cjmarie's work very much and the story start may sound similar but the story itself is nothing close I promise!

Still short chapter I realise but once I posted the first part I couldn't stop writing. And when I finished this part I couldn't wait to post it

Hope you like!

Chapter 2: Square One

Posted on Nov. 24 2007

"So Mr. Bloom. How are you feeling today?" The hospital psychiatrist, a middle-aged kind looking man with glasses asked Trowa sitting in front of him looking disinterested. Trowa didn't answer and just looked outside the window staring at the birds flittering about outside.

"Dr. Ansami tells me that you believe yourself to be sixteen years old and believe in the Gundam robots?"

Silence.

"If you don't talk to me Mr. Bloom I can't help you. I am sure you're feeling a bit disoriented because of your coma but we need to clear up any misunderstandings. Now tell me, you asked for a Quatre Rab.. ba Winner?" He stumbled through the name and Trowa looked at him.

"Raberba. Quatre Raberba Winner." He corrected and the psychiatrist smiled, finally getting a word out of him.

"Tell me about him."

Silence. Trowa stared at the doctor hoping that he would let it go. He really didn't want to talk about Quatre… a guy who might not exist but he was still very much infatuated with to a man who had no idea what he was feeling.

The psychiatrist sighed. Trowa returned to staring outside the window.

"At least tell me what you saw in your dream." He asked exasperated.

"It wasn't a dream." He stated his eyes still on the birds.

"Okay, so tell me what you think is going on?"

Trowa was tired of this. He wanted to go home… wherever home was. "Did you let Catherine know?"

The doctor frowned for a moment but gave in. "She'll be coming to pick you up tomorrow. But you have to come to at least three sessions with me for me to evaluate you."

"I'm not coming here again." He stated plainly. He got up, put the chair back exactly as he had found it and left the office. The psychiatrist sighed and closed Trowa's file.

oOOo

"Where are we going?" Trowa and Catherine were in Catherine's car and she had just taken an exit that turned towards farms and isolated houses.

"Home." She said.

"Home? We're farmers?"

"No! But we live in a cottage by the country side. I work in a banking firm. So…in your dream, what did I do?" She asked him curiously, gesturing with one hand, the other she kept on the wheel. Trowa had been surprised when Catherine had showed up. She was wearing a suit, her hair in a bun… so unlike the Catherine he remembered from his dream.

He smiled slightly before telling her, "Circus performer."

"No way!" She gaped and then laughed at the idea.

"How did I end up in a coma?" He asked bluntly and Catherine glanced at him.

"You fell. You were out in the woods climbing trees, you always loved doing that, and you lost your grip and fell. It was a head injury. It was worsened by the fact that it took me a while to realize what you were missing and then even longer to find you."

"Hmm." Trowa grunted.

"Don't go climbing any more trees, okay Triton? I always worried for you and see? You ended up losing three years of your life because of that reckless hobby."

"Do you know anyone named Quatre?" Catherine shot him a puzzled look.

"Not that I know of. Why?"

"No reason." He said and then returned to staring outside the window, watching the scenery zip by him.

Catherine shrugged. At least her brother was alive and well. She had been convinced that he would never come home.

oOOo

"Triton! The package will be delivered in about an hour but I have to run. Would you mind signing for it?" Catherine said hanging half off the staircase railing, her shoes in one hand. Trowa leaned out of the kitchen wearing a green apron and a spatula in his hand.

"I will." He let her know before returning to the kitchen.

"Make sure you're not late for work okay? You just graduated, you want to make a good impression on your boss." She said as she came into the kitchen, placed a kiss on his cheek before grabbing her purse.

"Be safe." He told Catherine who shot him a grin and left.

Trowa sighed. It had been four years since he'd come out of the coma. He had written the equivalency tests for high school and had gotten a score high enough to be given a diploma. Then he went to college and majored in Arts. Now he had recently gotten a job as a design consultant at a reputable company.

And yet, every night he still dreamt of Quatre. He dreamt of things he had gone through with the pilots. He felt keenly as though they had been real. That somehow they had gotten ripped away from him… specially Quatre.

He had drawn pictures of him, afraid that maybe one day he won't remember what Quatre looked like. But he kept the pictures hidden. He had made the mistake of showing one to Catherine and she had looked at him like he was mad. Of courses she didn't say anything but the look in her eyes made him want to hide them next time.

Finishing up he removed the food from the stove to let it air out. Both Catherine and he got home late so he always cooked dinner in the morning. Catherine left before him so he had taken that responsibility. Just as he had removed his apron the doorbell rang.

Must be the package.

He went to the door and was greeted by a young man, probably late twenties who smiled at him. "Package for Ms. Catherine Bloom?"

"I'm her brother. I'll sign for it." Trowa said as he was handed the package and the form. His hand easily scribbled 'Triton' on the paper even though he still couldn't think of himself as Triton.

"Have a good day sir!" He said as he turned to leave. Just as Trowa was closing the door he saw three cars appear. There was a truck following them and they all stopped in the street in front of his house.

Then came all the people. One after another emerging from the cars, all the women, the children… it was like a carnival only that all of them were dressed in suits and dresses. A rich family?

Out of curiosity he opened the door a little more and watched as the truck was opened and the people milling about started shooting orders at the guys bringing out furniture. So they were moving in… Trowa decided. He looked at the direction they were all heading in and it was the house next to his. Neighbours.

He watched as a little boy went and hit another little boy and they started fighting. A pretty woman appeared from the crowd and broke up the fight. He also watched as a man fight with the people moving the furniture. It was lively.

"It's beautiful here isn't it?" A smooth, gentle voice came from beside him and Trowa turned to acknowledge the person. When he saw who had said it his voice stuck in his throat and he felt his hands quiver. "Very different from the city. Although I did enjoy the bustle of the city, the peace here is very appealing too." Trowa continued to stare and the boy in front of him started to worry a little. "Are you all right?" He asked but Trowa wasn't listening. He was staring at the blond hair, the blue eyes, the petite frame.

"You…" He managed to say.

"Oh! My name is Quatre Winner." He said offering his hand with a friendly smile. "What is your name?"

"Quatre?" He asked, not believing that not only did this boy look exactly like Quatre from his dream, he sounded like him too. Quatre took his hand back but didn't look offended.

"Yes, it's an Arabic name. I know we don't look Arabic, with the blond hair and blue eyes, but my entire family's like that." He supplied gesturing fondly towards the crowd of people.

"Your family?" He felt like he was going insane. This can't be it. Quatre was a dream… wasn't he? He can't be real…

"Yes, quite a lot of people aren't there? I alone have a lot of sisters."

"Twenty-nine?" Trowa asked feeling his stomach jump.

Quatre laughed. "No, but you were close. Nine sisters."

"How was I close?"

"You got the last number right." He smiled and Trowa felt the warming sensation in his chest that he hadn't felt since his dream. "Looks like we'll be neighbours! Hope to see you soon again Mr…?"

"Trowa Barton." Trowa introduced himself, refusing to use his newer name.

"I'll see you soon then Trowa. Good day!" And with that Quatre turned around and returned to his family's side. Trowa stared wide-eyed for a little while longer before sagging down onto the stone porch in disbelief.

His neighbour was Quatre.

* * *

A/N: Quatre's back! I can't keep Trowa unhappy for too long now can I? (grins) 


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing.

A/N: I promise you this will be a boring chapter. But I also promise you the next chapter will be more interesting :) I can't write non dramatic for too long now can I? hehe!

Now onto the story...

Chapter 3: Meet the Winners

Posted 16th December 2007

Catherine hummed to herself, her fingers drumming to an unknown rhythm against the steering wheel as she turned the corner. Her eyes lit up at the sight of their house and she was reminded of just how tired she was.

As she pulled into her driveway she saw the lights on in the neighbouring house.

'Hmm… I thought it was empty…' She wondered to herself and got out of the car, locking it with a flick of the remote control key. She walked to her door, her heels clacking against the stone surface of their porch breaking the silence of the evening. Expecting the house to be empty considering Triton was let out an hour later than her, she was surprised when she opened the door and found him sitting on the carpet in the living room, holding his sketch book.

"Triton! How come you're back so early?"

He didn't answer her but instead opened his sketch book and started leafing through the drawings.

"Triton?" She stepped closer to him cautiously. He wasn't responding. He just kept leafing through the sketches. "Triton…are you okay?" She kneeled down in front of him and grasped his shoulder lightly and he looked up at her, his green eyes confused and disoriented. "Are you okay?" She asked again softly.

She watched as his eyes cleared up and he got up quickly grabbing a hold of Catherine's hand and pulling her towards the door, his sketchbook still held tightly in his other hand. "Triton! What are you doing?" When Trowa dragged her with him outside the house letting the door slam shut behind them she started panicking, wondering if he'd lost his mind. "Triton! Triton let go!" She said loudly but he pulled her along easily, her petite feminine frame unable to put up much of a fight against his more muscular one. He dragged her all the way to the house next to theirs, the one that had been empty just yesterday.

"What is_wrong_ with you?" Catherine asked feeling annoyed when he finally let her hand go.

"Do you see them? Are they real?" He asked pointing to the windows of the house with the lights on.

"What's going on Triton?" She asked worriedly. Trowa was acting so weird…

"Do you see them or not? Is the house empty? Are the lights on? Which is it?" He asked looking annoyed and frustrated but he looked desperate as well.

"I see them." She told him, seeing the shadows move across the large windows, the details of the figures obscured by the light behind them. "There's someone there. It's not empty." She confirmed for him and he visibly relaxed.

"Do you remember Quatre?" He looked at her, his eyes sparkling. "Remember him?" He said pulling out a sketch of the blonde boy and showing it to her. It was his favourite sketch, he had drawn Quatre sitting on a bed playing the violin, his eyes soft and lost in the music.

"Yeah I remember… what's going on?" She squeaked when Trowa grabbed her hand again and tugged her towards the front door of the house, dragging her mercilessly across the lawn. "Triton! Goddammit!"

He pulled her to his side and rang the doorbell once, letting Catherine compose herself by fixing her skirt and hair. The door opened slightly and a middle aged man with dark brown hair and dark eyes greeted them. "Hello?"

"Hello Mr. Winner?" Trowa said and Catherine's eyes widened at the name. She remembered that name! "My name is Trowa and this is Catherine. We live next door. We just came to say hello." Trowa said with a small smile and Catherine felt faint with what she was hearing. She gaped at Trowa and then at the older man. Then she opened her mouth and closed it several times unable to talk.

"Oh hello!" He greeted. "Come in, come in." He said and stepped back from the door to let them in. "We were just sitting down for dinner, would you care for some?"

Catherine was about to refuse but before she could say anything Trowa squeezed her hand to shut her up and then proceeded to accept the invitation. They followed the man into the dining room that currently had boxes taped shut lined against the wall. There was a massive, mahogany table in the centre of the room with several chairs placed around it about half of them filled.

"Iria, scoot down a bit and let these two children join in as well. They're our neighbours." Trowa started at the name of Iria… there's no way there could be this many coincidences could there? He watched Iria get up, her hair tied back in a pony tail, longer than he remembered from his 'dream'. She poked her sister sitting next to her and then the whole room erupted into a frenzy trying to make space for the two new people.

"_What are you doing?_" Catherine hissed at Trowa through clenched teeth just low enough that no one else would hear. He ignored her, his eyes scanning the room looking for just _one_ blonde boy.

"Catherine!" Mr. Winner called out and a petite blonde woman shuffled out of the kitchen wearing an apron. "Catherine, we have guests. Let the others know it's time for dinner." He said to her and she nodded glancing at Trowa and Catherine as they sheepishly seated themselves in the room dominated by women. The loud talking that had been going on when they came in was now quiet and every one of the five women – Trowa counted – was staring at them… more specifically at him.

"What's your name?" One of them asked, who was sitting across from him.

"Trowa." He answered easily and completely dismissed Catherine's glare shot at him. "And this is Catherine." He gestured to her with a wave of his hand.

"I'm Aida." She said. She looked like the oldest of them all. She had her hair tied in a braid and her eyes were blue just like the rest of the family… except Mr. Winner. She then pointed at the rest of the girls seated. "That's Amna, Fida, Alina and Iria." She introduced and got out a weak hello from all of them.

"Abbu?"(1) A small voice called from upstairs. "Quatre says he's not hungry." She explained when Mr. Winner stood under the staircase and looked up. The dining room was right in front of the winding staircase and Trowa could see the young girl leaning against the barrister talking to her father.

"Tell him we have guests." He said and the girl nodded and retreated.

"That's Rasha." Aida said distractedly and Trowa nodded.

"How many of you are there?" Catherine asked, her voice exceptionally shy. Maybe she was feeling overwhelmed by all the people in the house? Trowa mused.

"Ten in total." She explained. "Nine sisters, and one brother."

Forgetting her manners momentarily Catherine whistled in awe.

The girl named Amna sitting next to Aida laughed. "Yeah, we get that reaction a lot." She said, her hair were short, cropped to about an inch below her ear and she had a more mischievous look to her. "So do you guys have children?"

Trowa and Catherine looked at each other and then their eyes widened. "Oh no! We're siblings!" Catherine explained waving her hands in front of her as if to dismiss the idea. "I'm his sister."

Every one of the girls in the room made a silent 'oh' and before anything else could be said there was some commotion outside.

"Abbu, Quatre doesn't want to come." Rasha called from upstairs.

'Quatre?' Catherine mouthed and Trowa resisted the urge to smirk at her.

"Quatre!" Mr. Winner hollered suddenly and both Trowa and Catherine jumped. No one else seemed to think it was out of the ordinary. "We have guests!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming." Came a muffled voice from upstairs and then Quatre came… dragging his feet on the stairs and finally entering the dining room. His tired expression immediately vanished when he saw who the guests were. "Trowa!"

"Hello Quatre." He said, his voice softening and Catherine's jaw dropped open. He looked just like Quatre… well… the other Quatre… the one Trowa was in love with…

Trowa clutched the sketchbook tightly in his lap to make sure it was still there. He wouldn't want Quatre to get a glimpse of it and think he was a psycho of some kind.

Quatre quickly came around the table to Trowa's side and then started poking Aida. "Could you move sis? I want to sit here." He said pushing against her with his hips.

"I always sit here! Get your own chair!" She huffed and he pouted. Then he left for a minute, came back dragging a chair from somewhere. He dragged it all the way around the table and purposefully pushed it between Aida and Trowa. Aida glared but then scooted to the side letting Quatre cut in the middle.

"Hi Trowa." He said smiling, sitting sideways on his chair so that he was facing him. He leaned a little to the side to look at Catherine. "Hello?"

"Oh, this is Catherine, my sister." Trowa made sure to introduce her fully. He wouldn't want Quatre to think he was taken or anything. No… that wouldn't be good at all.

"Hi Catherine! It's nice to meet you! You're pretty." He said smiling brightly at her and she blushed against her better judgement. True she was older than him and he didn't look much older than eighteen… but still… he was quite a charmer.

"Isn't she a little old for you?" One of the sisters said snidely and Quatre ignored her while Catherine huffed indignantly. Trowa went through the list of introductions he had been given by Aida and decided it was Fida who had spoken. Completely ignoring the comment Quatre continued to talk to Trowa.

Trowa just basked in the presence of the blonde beauty beside him. After four years of believing that he would never see his love again… suddenly here he was… sitting right next to him, talking to him, smiling at him.

"Is something wrong? Something's on my face isn't there?" Quatre said suddenly looking self conscious and Trowa realized he had been staring.

He looked away but his eyes returned back to Quatre almost immediately. "No, your face is perfect." He said and Quatre blushed lightly at the thinly veiled compliment.

"Ummi… We're hungry." He called out and almost immediately the mother, Trowa assumed, walked in with a steaming pot followed by three more girls all carrying plates and silverware and stuff. "That's Zaria, Nadia and Maha behind Ummi." He introduced and Trowa felt like he was going cross-eyed. There was little chance he'll have everyone's names right. "Nadia and Maha are married, they're just here for a few days. Remember the kids fighting in the morning?" He asked looking sideways at Trowa, "Their kids. The little girl is Sara and the boy is Omar." Trowa nodded feeling slightly dazed with all the information. One quick glance showed Catherine struggling as well.

Seeing their expressions Quatre laughed lightly. "Don't worry, no one will kill you if you get their names wrong."

The rest of the dinner went fairly uneventful but Trowa was glad he had decided to stay. It was the first time he had seen what a somewhat normal family acted like.

After dinner Trowa got pulled into conversation with Mr. Winner and Quatre while Catherine pleaded exhaustion and left early. Even then Quatre's mom managed to hand her some left over dessert.

"Leaving already?" Quatre asked hovering in the doorway as Trowa pulled his shoes on.

"It's getting late." He offered in a way of explanation even though he didn't really want to go.

"Hmm…" Quatre grabbed a pair of sneakers sitting in the corner of the room and pulled them on. "Mind if I walk with you?"

Trowa smiled in answer. Shouting to the house that he was going for a walk he pulled Trowa out and closed the door behind him.

"Big family." Trowa said softly, the silence of the dark street making him feel as though he needed to whisper. "It's nice."

Quatre beamed up at him with a bright smile. "It is. But the lack of privacy gets to you. Not to mention the constant talk about color schemes and make up tips." He said gesturing with one hand to show his frustration.

"It must be frustrating to be the only boy in the family."

"Not as frustrating as it is lonely I guess." He explained and then shrugged when Trowa looked at him. "No one to talk to. My sisters get too emotional. My dad starts telling me about how nothing is more important that achieving a goal and the little problems along the way are just distractions. It gets lonely."

As they walked Trowa went right past his house, opting for more time to talk to the blonde boy. "You can talk to me if you want." Trowa offered and Quatre smiled at him.

"Thank you." He said sincerely. "I would like us to be friends."

"I already think we're friends Quatre." He answered his hand rising to pet Quatre's hair by itself, the habit from his dream suddenly manifesting itself. Trowa managed to catch his slip before the hand actually made contact with the gold strands and pulled it back to his side.

They walked in silence for a little while and Trowa made a complete round of the neighbourhood before leading the smaller boy back to his bustling house. "You already know where I live. Come over anytime." Trowa said to him as Quatre smiled and opened the door to his house.

"Good night Trowa." He said and closed the door gently. Trowa smiled a full, happy smile and then resisted the urge to skip to his house. No… skipping was more of Maxwell's thing.

His smile faltered as he thought about all the guys. Maxwell's loud brashness and loyal personality, Yuy with his quiet strength and leadership… Wufei's not so quiet strength and ideals.

Sometimes he really missed those guys. But at least, fate had been nice enough to him to give him Quatre back.

* * *

1) Abbu: Arabic for Dad. Similarly, Ummi: Arabic for Mom. 

I had to do some serious hunting to find out what Mr. Winner was like. Am I wrong when I say he's depicted as stern? Also... anybody know his first name? I didn't watch the series in its entirety so... yeah...

A/N: It'll pick up soon... it's just going slower than I expected...

Hope you liked!  
Persephone


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